The Gay Borg

The Gay Borg
Hugh will be assimilated

Boy, the Girl Scouts are really taking it on the chin, lately. First, Archbishop Robert Carlson or the Catholic Church’s St. Louis diocese has encouraged churches and parishioners under his care to move away from the GSA because that organization’s values are incompatible with that of the church. That’s a fair assessment: the GSA is steadfastly against child rape and marginalization of women and people who are LGBTQ.

Next, Franklin Graham said he wasn’t buying any cookies this year because, “The Girl Scouts organization sure isn’t what it used to be”. Why does he say that? Well, it seems they allow girls who are trans to be members and agree with the Supreme Court ruling on marriage. In other words, they are accepting of all girls. Horror of horrors! And, as if that weren’t enough, this week, they caught it again. This time from Reverend Kevin Swanson.

You may remember Swanson as the preacher who said people who are LGBTQ are “worthy of death”. He is also an ardent supporter Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz. In fact, he made his “worthy of death” comment at a rally in Iowa where Cruz was speaking back in November. But, this isn’t about Ted; it’s about the latest batshit crazy to fall out of Swanson’s face hole.

Right Wing Watch claims that, on his radio show last week,  Swanson called for Girl Scout leaders to be drowned with a millstone around their neck for leading young girls into an “unbiblical lifestyle”.  That is pretty fucking crazy, huh? Unfortunately, I think they’re stretching it a bit. It sounded to me like Swanson was referring to Matthew 18:6 in the metaphorical sense; as in, what the GSA is doing is really, really bad.

Of course, he’s full of shit, because what the GSA is not really, really bad. Specifically, it does not turn girls into lesbians and it doesn’t give them abortifacients and contraceptives (he actually said both of those things). They do, however, train them to feminists; which is not the horrific thing Swanson seems to think. But, like a lot of conservative evangelicals, Kevin appears to believe in keeping women barefoot and pregnant, so I can see how that would upset him.

But, the best part of the broadcast came a little later, when Swanson was congratulating Franklin Graham for finally getting on board the anti-Girl Scout bandwagon (Swanson’s been beating this dead horse of a couple of years, apparently), saying “there are two pastors in America that stood out against the Girl Scouts on the issue of their supporting lesbianism, abortion, other things. And now, Franklin Graham stepped out and he’s taking a courageous stand. And, of course, now he’s being persecuted by the ‘Gay Borg’…” Wait a minute, the “Gay Borg”? Is that even a thing?

Evidently, it is and Swanson isn’t the only person talking about it. Scott Lively, who stands accused of  violating international law by conspiring to persecute the LGBT community in Uganda, used the phrase in an article on Barbwire last year, claiming that “any dissent from outside the Collective attracts the entire body of Borg-like drones — like a swarm of hornets — in the single-minded quest to seek and either assimilate or destroy whatever person or entity has been foolish enough to challenge it.” Oh my.

The earliest use I can find of the term (in this context, at least) dates back to 2014. In article on Herman Cain’s website about Mozilla’s CEO stepping down over a contribution to a group fighting same-sex marriage, Dan Calabrese wrote, “The gay movement understands something. They understand that in order for their movement to ultimately succeed, they need to turn the entire culture into a mindless army of obedient adherents like the Borg on Star Trek.” You know, I’m seeing a trend here: the people who like to use this expression are kind of douchey.

This brings up a few questions. Like are all gay people part of the Collective? If not, how do we tell the difference? I mean, on Star Trek, the Borg have all those nifty cybernetic attachments to set them apart. I know quite a few a folks who are LGBT and they don’t have anything like that…, well, anything visible, that is (insert your own punchline, pervs). And, does having gay friends mean I’m more vulnerable? Oh shit, what if I’ve already been assimilated don’t even know it?!?

We are the Gay Borg. Resistance is not only futile, it’s fabulous.