A Few Thoughts On NC House Bill 2

Psst, HB 2 isn't really about keeping women safe.
Psst, HB 2 isn’t really about keeping anyone safe.

It would’ve been more timely if I had written this yesterday, but I had a prior engagement with some wisteria vines and privet hedge that had to be kept. That’s probably for the best because, yesterday, I was still pretty pissed off about today’s subject and things were a little raw. Had I written this post then, it would’ve been one long string of expletives and virtually unreadable (it may not be much better today). What caused all that anger? Wednesday, the North Carolina General Assembly shoved through a bill that pretty much ensures that LGBTQ folks in this state will be discriminated against.

If you haven’t heard about NC House Bill 2, it will, in the words of Governor Pat McCrory, “prevent basic local government overreach and intrusion into the expectation of privacy that people have, men, women and children have when they enter a restroom, locker room or shower facility,” So, you’re preventing “government overreach and intrusion” by engaging in …, government overreach? Right. I think that may be the most unintentionally ironic statement I’ve heard all year.

Of course, not everyone agrees with the governor. Senator Jeff Jackson of Charlotte and Rep. Graig Meyer of Charlotte worked hard on Wednesday to get the word out about some of things the law does, like preventing cities and counties from writing their own non-discrimination ordinances that protect LGBTQ folks and veterans; removing legal remedy in the NC court system (you have to sue in federal court which is much harder) and barring local governments from setting the minimum wage in their communities. Nice, huh?

But, that’s just the tip of the iceberg, as multiple companies are speaking out against the law and some are questioning whether they want to do business here. When the GOP took over the reins of government in this state, one of their stated goals was to make it more attractive to business. They are really knocking it out of the park with this, aren’t they?

So, now that we’re all on the same page, there are a few things I want to get off my chest concerning this big, steaming pile of shit questionable piece of legislation:

  • First of all, I want to thank our illustrious lawmakers for the additional anxiety they’ve put on my plate. I mean, I’m not quite stressed enough whenever my son walks out the door, worrying about him running into some asshole who takes offense at the fact that he’s trans. So, this extra dose of angst I get, wondering whether he’ll be denied a service he needs or be humiliated in some other way because he’s not “normal” is really welcome. When it comes to being douche bags, you guys are the douchiest!
  • Second, there are only two ways that I can see someone’s motivations for supporting this law. One is that you think my son is predator who might use an ordinance like Charlotte’s to find new prey. The other is that my child’s well-being is less important to you than an imaginary threat to some women and children yet to be named. Either way you look at it, that’s pretty fucked up.
  • Third, how is this going to work, bathroom-wise? Are we going to post someone outside each and every women’s restroom in the state to look in everyone’s pants and ensure they’re using the bathroom of their “biological sex”? I don’t think that will go over very well. I mean, if people are worried about their daughters being in the bathroom with men, how are they going to feel about some stranger taking a peek inside their little princess’ knickers?

Of course, we could all just mind our own business and let folks pee where they like, seeing as how all the fear over bathroom bills is totally unfounded (it has been debunked by law enforcement, government officials, and women’s safety advocates all across the country). Mind our own business?!? Where’s the fun in that?