I love bumper stickers. And, the tackier they are, the more I love ’em . This all started when I was a kid. When we would take a trip, I’d see cars with bumper stickers from all the places the owners had been and I thought it was wonderful. I was always drawn to the racks of stickers in every dumpy little shop, gas station and Stuckey’s we stopped at. I loved them all and wanted every one of them. My mother would always try to steer me to the post cards, but they were never as good. How can a namby-pamby post card saying “Wish You Were Here!” compete with “Hot Today, Chile Tamale” (South of the Border) or “See Rock City!” (Rock City, of course)? As I grew up, my fascination with bumper stickers never left me and I found a whole new (for me) genre of stickers: funny (?) religious bumper stickers. Let’s look at a few:
Who’s deciding what God said and what it settled?
A classic.
Do these people know how to work the guilt angle, or what? Here’s another:
Jesus wants raccoons? And, if does, couldn’t he get His own?
That “fishers of men” thing never gets old, does it?
What, He doesn’t love people who drive cars?
As a play on words, it’s remarkably lame. As a kitschy, tacky bumper sticker, it’s genius.
Of course, no Christian bumper sticker list would be complete without a rapture reference.
A sub-genre of the religious sub-genre (would that be a sub-sub-genre?) is the snarky, anti-religious religious bumper sticker. I love these because they appeal my own smart-alecky tendency to tweak the nose of people who take themselves just a little too seriously. Some examples:
Ain’t that the truth.
I’m embarrassed to admit I’ve actually said these words.
So, Kilroy was inspired by God?
Business in the front, party in the back!
You know, a little Immodium would fix that.
One of my favorites. And, true too.
Another favorite and a message I desperately want to impart to certain people.Yet another desperately needed message.
Hmm, I’m seeing a trend here…
Yeah, I know it’s not a bumper sticker. But, I like it anyway.
Counterpoint to the rapture sticker.
And, finally, my favorite bumper sticker of all time:
A Christian fart joke? That’s a first.
I realize some of the snarky ones may be offensive to certain people. But, it’s only fair; some of yours are offensive to everybody else. Don’t worry though, I’m on the always on the lookout for new ones and I’m sure I’ll find something even more offensive.